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Writer's pictureSecret Garden

The Quiet Storm

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This past couple of months for me has been something for the record books. And I am sure it has been one for you as well. We are all experiencing a pandemic, suffering from restricted socializing, not able to enjoy the things we once took for granted such as visiting friends and family regularly, eating out at your favorite restaurant, traveling to a different state or country, or even the simple things that we consider a requirement when it deals with our self-care.  Many haven’t even grasped the fact that this is a real situation because they are so wrapped up in the conspiracies that have been conjured up in various social media outlets.  Others take it seriously because they know someone or witnessed their loved ones suffer or die from this “unknown” virus called COVID-19.  Whatever the case may be, this virus has taken life away as if mother nature came in with a quiet storm.

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I, however, have been keeping my opinions to myself because many aren’t going to understand the magnitude of what I am trying to deliver. It’s as if I am on an island alone and appreciating the gift the Earth has given me. I take this pandemic as a blessing in disguise. For one thing, so many of us have worked long hours or been away from our family that we haven’t had the opportunity to experience peace and relaxation in its purest form. Your relationships with family, friends, and spouses are tested during this time. You can work on yourself completely. What was once consider the norm is changing right in front of us. It is forcing many of us to spend quality time with our children, spouses, and parents. It is forcing us to teach our children (and ourselves) the old fashion way. It is also forcing many parents to deal with their children’s behavior that they wanted to avoid. It’s forcing necessary changes for everyone, whether you want to or not.

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Believe it or not, we all have to adjust to this.  Hell, I can’t get my son off the game or out of bed because he is accustom to entertaining himself.  Because of this pandemic, I realized where I fell short as a parent to both my children.  Their normal was to go to school, get good grades, behave, entertain yourself, and don’t get on mommy’s nerve because she’s been working or too busy for them.  My normal was to go to work and provide for them in the best way possible. The weekends were my children’s reward days.  Is it fair to them? Absolutely not.  But it made me take a look at myself.  I wasn’t there for them, but I was there for them (many of you will understand this phrase when you get home).  I have some work to do personally when it deals with my children and parenting. And guess what, I don’t have a choice but to deal with it face on because I have nowhere to run but back in the house!!! Many of you can feel me on this one hahaha!!!

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Society has dropped the ball when it deals with the relationship between work and family. This is why so many nonessentials are fighting to work over family. Think about it. You go back to work and you will NOT get the same money you once received because many will NOT support or come to your establishment because they are going to stay home. Why not receive some of the assistance that the state can give your small business? If states decide to open, it forfeits your opportunity for state assistance. This means more money for the “ultimate” rich. Do you wonder why so many states are opening up? Did you ask yourself why they won’t open up their business, homes, or tours of their building? Why not revamp your business and work from home? Take this time to prepare for a time like this again. The United States is entirely too cocky to think otherwise. But then again, this is what got us into this mess.

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I realized the real meaning of natural beauty. To see people without makeup, haircuts, and nails is breathtaking. When you have to deal with all of you from the natural state, it becomes a beautiful experience. You begin to learn to love yourself more for who you are. The superficial things don’t matter anymore. Yes, I have seen people go out and defy what the governor has instructed us to do. That just shows how society has made vanity, materialistic things, and beauty a priority in this world that we live in. Many people care more about how he/she looks instead of their well-being. Some people will risk their lives to satisfy their vanity. Some people will even say they won’t let fear change them. But is it worth it?

It is so many things you can do with this precious time that you have.  You can take rides out just to get out of the house without getting out of the car going into places. Take a walk around the neighborhood (if possible) with a mask on to protect yourself. If you have a back yard, sit outside or on the porch to gain sunlight.  Find activities for you and your family that have been together during this new-norm to participate in.  Write that book, draw the pictures, or complete the sewing projects you so desperately wanted to complete.  If you want to sleep later than usual, do so.  Take this time to enjoy the simple things that this Earth has that we were too blind to see.

Lastly, our mental health is being tested and affected by this pandemic. Many will fall into a deep depression because they haven’t been able to socialize or come outside. Many will go through abuse. I understand that your business and livelihood are suffering, but ask yourself this one question? Is it really worth playing Russian roulette with your life or others that you surround yourself with?  You go back to work and catch the virus.  You die or give it to someone you love that dies because of your selfish ways. Is it worth putting your mother, father, daughter, son, grandkids, best friend, spouse, etc. at risk of dying because you have to go out and visit friends, co-workers, and others because you are bored? Is it fair to put others at risk because you want to go outside and play various sports or exercise with a group because you can’t stand being alone?  Is it fair to defy what your spouse, parent, children, or grandchildren ask you to do (stay inside and stop going out with your friends/associates) because they fear you will put them at risk? Is it possible for you to think about someone else other than yourself and your feelings?

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If you have to go out for essentials or peace of mind alone or with family:

  1. make sure to wear a mask even if you don’t believe you can catch it. Wash your hands and sanitize!!!

  2. Get what you need out of the stores and leave.  You are being selfish and inconsiderate to the workers there and people who just want to pick up a few necessities and go home.

  3. Please give people space even if you don’t want to.  Practice social distancing for the person around you.

  4. If the people that want to get together and risk their lives and have to learn the hard way; let them. You practice what you need to keep you and your family safe.

  5. Protect the innocent.  Don’t take children out to the stores and putting them at risk (if possible). Even if you believe it’s not a real virus; protect the innocent.

  6. Pamper your mind, body, and soul. Find what it is you enjoy and is available that will ease your mind without putting others at risk. Private time, drink of wine, listening to music, working out, or planting, gardening, or reading a book.  Family or alone drives. There are things you can do without risking your health.

  7. Participate in online services that deliver or offer curbside pickup.

  8. Instead of ordering out, cook as a family.  Make meals together.

Whether you believe the numbers are fake, it’s a conspiracy, or you don’t give a damn if you die, don’t put others that didn’t ask for this or don’t have the same beliefs or mental capacity to know better at risk because of your selfish and asinine ways.  Please respect people’s personal space.  Please don’t put illness or death onto others because of your personal belief.  I don’t want to die alone without my loved ones beside me if I can help it.  I don’t want to be left in a hospital all alone.  I don’t want my children or family to have to sit at home without telling me how much they love me while I die alone. I don’t want them to feel guilty for not being by my side. I damn sure don’t want to have a funeral without my family having the opportunity to say their last goodbyes. I just don’t want to risk that.  Call me selfish, I guess.

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