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Writer's pictureSecret Garden

Vengeance Is Not Mine

Have you ever wondered why certain people who always cause problems in people’s lives and/or hurt people never get what’s coming to them? Or how about that big bully who is always breaking down someone’s self-esteem in order to enhance theirs?  Yes, you can have adult bullies, my friend. What about that infamous co-worker that is always stirring up drama and negativity within the workplace but always seems to get rewarded or promoted while everyone else gets the tail end of the stick (the Donald Trump syndrome)? Sometimes it just isn’t in the cards for them to receive that revenge you so magically want to happen. Maybe it isn’t karma at all; it is just written in their book of life.

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I used to wish harm on others that harmed me.  I wanted them so badly to feel the pain “they caused” me.  I felt they were responsible for the heartache and pain; therefore they needed to taste their own medicine.  What better way to satisfy this mental request than to seek revenge!!! Misery loves company right? Let’s just play a game of tit-for-tat. That would solve everything right?

As a teenager and in my early twenties I did just that. You hurt me; I hurt you back.  I knew it wasn’t the right thing to do, but I did it anyway because I thought it would make everything better. But in most cases, all it did was create more problems and situations I wasn’t willing to serve time for or deal with the consequences.  I may have sliced a couple of tires or try to run you over, but it still didn’t fulfill the revenge I was trying to seek. In the end, it didn’t make me feel any better than I did when I was hurt; and it damn sure didn’t make them feel sorry for what they did to me. Instead, I got bit by “karma”!!!

Seeking revenge isn’t for us to do, and waiting for them to suffer isn’t going to make your life pleasant at all. It takes a plethora of energy and time from your life trying to either inflict pain on someone or wait for their downfall.  Why create such negative energy and space in your mind for someone who didn’t give a rat’s ass about you or your well-being? Trust me even when you think someone hasn’t gotten what they deserve; they always do!!!  You just don’t see it or hear about it!!!  Most of the time people who treat others poorly are suffering from their own demons; that it causes personal issues that only that person can identify. They will continue to deal with bad situations until they decide to do right by others and situations. When they can finally identify that continuing doing wrong to others or themselves isn’t winning; that’s when their life will be a whole lot better. But until then, the circle of negativity will prevail.

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For example, people who always put down someone or bullies others most of the time are dealing with inner issues concerning themselves.  They may feel they aren’t worthy or ugly on the outside.  Every day they look at themselves and see nothing good about them.  Imagine waking up every day looking at YOURSELF that way.  That’s punishment alone if you ask me. You will never get to experience happiness because you’re never happy with yourself. Sometimes that same person who has constantly hurt others may not be able to hold down a job or their own place to live because instead of them suffering at the hands of others; they are suffering in adulthood without a pot to piss in or a leg to stand on.  Imagine having that personal label stamped on your back? That’s not a great feeling as an adult. They are walking around knowing others may have the same personal thoughts they have about themselves. They may even have to face their own children going thru situations that are unbearable to watch. It’s not up to you to know or see that. They are living a life of what you may call “hell”. Imagine not having stability in your adult life? Sometimes things happen called, karma.

Don’t get me wrong there are people out there that are good people, but can’t get their life together because they haven’t decided to take the steps to become mentally and financially stable.  That is when it becomes a situation of choice and decision-making on their part. Karma has nothing to do with it. Someone who is suffering from mental illness or disabilities doesn’t fall under the realm of karma. That’s just in their cards called life.

I would never forget this one particular young lady who was with my husband. I recalled saying to her, “You continue your path of being a fabulous home wrecker, but you will NEVER be rewarded the gift of a wife or be in any relationship that will be monogamous and trusting!” She cursed me out something terrible and laughed so hard at me.  She even called me crazy and said she didn’t care.  But guess what, eight years later her ass has some type of serious illness and her long-term boyfriend still hasn’t married her, and guess what else…. he’s cheating on her!!! I didn’t have to do anything at all but walk away and let the chips fall where they may.  I’m sure she’s sitting in misery right now and pretending she’s cool with the situation. Don’t get me wrong, some of his women got married, but I know they aren’t really that happy because if they couldn’t be trusted; what makes them think they can trust someone else to be faithful to them? They will forever live the life of either cockiness or fear. Being too cocky can hurt you more when you find out you have been deceived when you “knew no one would hurt you”. Fear can take over your life because you will always wonder when will karma come.

Hell, I even think my karma came in my last relationship haha!!!! I would tell myself, “Tonya, even though you were separated for over 6 years without getting your divorce finalized (that’s another blog topic), you were STILL MARRIED, whether he refused to sign the papers or not!!!” Therefore, I got served what I deserved, a horrific lesson concerning narcissistic behavior, stalking, drug addiction, and abuse. My ex-husband and I laugh (not in a joking manner; but in a relieved way) at this karmic lesson today!!! But I am pretty sure he met karma as well, but it’s not for me to know unless he chooses to share it with me.

It’s not up to me or you when it comes to karma. If you leave well enough alone; all things that were meant to happen happens. 
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